Kit Kelen #1357 - the insult

1357

the insult

for ataraxia 

must simply switch off

never ask about me

runs round

aren’t you my victim?

because I lent you

helped when asked

dream the old anxieties

conflated to make new

once you owed

I was the one more worry

what I’d become

now punished

for asking

it was all done to

done to you

fists at

fists back

fall down here

it’s true I can’t imagine

how far down it goes

husband daughter did

whole families

always another bottle

and coward, I protect myself

in the eggshell minefield

how little I am in your excuse

one by one the unfriending

such a little thing

the old complaints

we’ve all been here before

tend some malignancy

every so often

threaten to top

after all everyone else is ahead

there’s only death to do

how drear, glum

sorry for, defeated

runs round in the head

all weather’s a curse

when will you pay me?

no interest please

anyone who helps oppresses

still have the urge to

control it

the interest is the insult

make me usurer

how all of life was done to you

o it’s alright for me

my kind

clouds and poems

well fed

tipple and snifter

fat in the rot

self satisfied

too much of myself

and nothing to see here

the interest is the insult

you won’t see me at all

so I’d might as well just vanish

and round around the garden too

where everything is all to do

grows its own way

weren’t we all once struck with the sun?

all the year waited

wasn’t there birthday bicycle?

now bury the kids in toys

that’s how the spoiled expect

how bright the rainbow lorikeets

how low the bower bird sweeps through

and it’s to teach us nothing

is anyone to blame in the garden?

I keep a postbox out of the world

with letters like this to send