Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Kristen de Kline # 14 - guilt sux

guilt sux

guilt sux fuck off guilt scrawl it in biro ink paint smear it onto drenched concrete: guilt sux F off guilt

you never stole from the rich/ you never gave to the poor/you didn't steal a scarf from Harrods/ you didn't steal a doll from Lovecraft/ you never stole you never gave/ scarfs dolls Harrods Lovecraft/ you never you didn't you never

I said: I thought the scream came from my house

You didn't lift a finger didn't stop the car just kept on rev-rev-revving around the block down the freeway moveable lanes fading into asphalt road workers in yellow fluorescent vests painting dotted lines on the road to somewhere nowhere anywhere in the no moon dark of night/don't believe what they say: it's not darkest before dawn don't believe what they say don't believe what you say/ you didn't lift a finger you didn't stop the car you didn't steal a scarf a doll you didn't steal a thing

 I said again: I thought the scream came from my house

You said you felt blood screaming through my veins but it was never enough/ you said you didn't lift a finger didn't stop the car didn't pause didn't brake you said you just kept on driving/ you said you felt blood screaming streaming screaming down my veins

In the rear vision mirror you caught a woman man woman seizing flailing seizing on the pavement/you said there were some chicks from your old high school holding a piece of you (A maggoty heart? A spliced finger? A bitten breast?) in a plastic jar/ I couldn't see it - the jar that is/ I think you made it all up/ you said you feel bad so bad/ you said you could see blood streaming screaming streaming through my veins/ you said you could get away with murder/ you said you said you said

In a dream I'm standing on the dampened concrete freeway with dotted lines disappearing too quickly underneath my feet. I'm wearing a fluoro vest that doesn't belong to me. I'm holding a STOP GO sign. I'm saying again: I thought the scream came from my house.

I'm pausing
stealing
dreaming
screaming

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