Sunday, October 9, 2016

Cui Yuwei 7#--Finding the Gravestone

Finding the Gravestone

after grandpa died
his second son buried him in a little patch of soil
at the corner of some farmland in the countryside
one summer I was led by a farmer
on a dirt road
winding to the far edge of the village
his tomb was half smothered by wild grass
which thrived unevenly upwards
it was very hard to find a spot
to kneel down and kowtow
no gravestone there
his second son said when his mother died they would be buried
together in the cemetery
another two years passed and grandma
passed on in the nursing home
they burned her and dug out grandpa, I mean the casket
with his ashes
then they took them to the cemetery
there was a gravestone this time but
they carved out a wrong character in my daughter’s name
I told them it was a mistake but they just let it go
a dead person wouldn’t know, they said

I visited them twice in the cemetery
but got lost each time among those bleak, dark stones
so much alike…
twice I gave up searching, leaned against a stone
near the roadside
I called their names and they knew
I was there


墓碑

爺爺死後
二叔把他埋在
鄉下菜地邊的一塊黃土下
有年夏天
一位村民領我順著一條土路拐進去
瘋長的野草
把他的墳遮了一半
很難找到一塊能落腳磕頭的地方
碑沒有立,二叔說過,等奶奶死後
再去公墓合葬
兩年後,奶奶死在養老院
他們焚燒了她,又挖出爺爺,我是說
挖出他的骨灰盒
再一同帶進公墓
這次終於有碑了,可他們卻把我女兒的名字
刻錯了一個字
我說弄錯了,他們也不當回事
那意思是死人知道什麼

我去公墓看過他們兩次
每一次
我都迷失在林立的墓碑之間
死去的人
都有一張相同的臉
我兩次放棄搜尋
揀了一座緊挨路邊的碑倚靠著
我喚他們的名字
他們知道
我就在那兒

4 comments:


  1. a crime against
    the spirit world to
    to say the dead don't
    know their names
    and some cultures
    don't speak them
    and others don't
    need them for long
    still others chant
    them endlessly
    in a special room
    called this life
    which we name
    in various ways
    looking for something

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A nice piece, Rob! We need to take awe of them.

      Delete

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