Pattern for an Arsehat
Arsehat, colloquial term
given to Australia’s highest order of political achievement.
Previously
referred to as
Prime Minister and currently worn by the Liberal Party’s Scott
Morrison - Urban Dictionary.
The pattern required
for a bat wraps says,
preferred size 45 cm
X 45 cm, use 100%
cotton flannelette
and poly-fill stuffing.
Koala mittens are
needed for burnt pads
of furry
marsupials, they held onto bark
of their engulfed
homes; they had no place left
to go. Rest the
koala template onto a piece of cotton
fabric and trace
four times, cut out the mitten
shape and sew
together 2 x 2. Leave bottom open
so that a burnt paw
may be placed inside.
Attach woolen tie
to X so tie can
be wrapped around
the base to tighten.
Repeat steps to
create second mitten.
Repeat again,
and again, but not
too many times as
koalas are functionally
extinct, their
habitats lost to land clearing,
killed by cars and
dogs, and the policies of
successive federal
and state governments.
Wildlife pouch
tutorial, please note that
liners should be
100% natural fibres
no synthetic fabrics
or anything plastic
No thread that
glitters. No bullshit brinkmanship
or pushing out
platitudes such as ‘thoughts
and prayers’, no
raising of empty palms
pressing flesh to
the greased wheel, no
having a cold one
for photo opportunity
with a quiet
Australian quietly sobbing
for all that he's lost on the nightly
news.
That pattern is too
well known.
yup
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