Menindee Story
the only tree tall enough,
the one near the toilet
block
on the Yartla St end of
the park
I took the cord up there
smoked a last bit of yaandi
court case coming
lock-away time coming
felt like my body was the
one thing
I was still in charge of
for a little while longer
as I was swinging there I
thought
my little cousins
they shouldn’t have to come
to the funeral
they’ve already been to so
many
I tried to get my fingers
in around the cord
but couldn’t do it
in the morning the ACLO
cut me down
this is Paakantji country, up Darling River way
Nyampa people here too
big lakes, lots of fishing
gotta watch out for that deep cold water but,
so cold it can stop your heart
and the ground so hot, so flat
our mob’s done a lot of dying
a lot of being murdered
old stories from before the Mission
Avoca station they put arsenic in the bread,
shot all the people out at Boolaboolka Lake
left their skeletons to bleach in the sun
now every Saturday night
there’s these three blokes
come to my grave
I didn’t hardly know them
but they bring a case,
crack a beer each
and pour an extra one down
over me
beer after beer until we’ve
all had six
one of them’s climbed that
tree five times
one of them burns himself
with cigarettes
even the 15-year-old has already
played chicken with a road
train
three more funerals coming
sooner or later
and the lake water still
so cold, so cold
© Melinda Smith 2016
yaandi – marijuana
ACLO – Aboriginal Community
Liason Officer
Among other things this
poem draws on Colin Tatz’s report Aboriginal suicide is different – an archived copy is here
If you need to talk to someone, call Lifeline 13 11 14, or beyondblue.org.au 1300 22 4636
If you need to talk to someone, call Lifeline 13 11 14, or beyondblue.org.au 1300 22 4636
Phaw, that's a poem packed with punch.
ReplyDeleteThis is the one I've been putting off writing. You can't do a series about suicide and not touch on this stuff, but it is so difficult to do properly as an outsider. Still a long way to go but at least now I have a draft I can ask people about
DeleteVery powerful poem. And the image of Menindee is lovely. Such a special place.
ReplyDeleteagreed! the last three sections, in particular, are really powerful in their understated way - yes, it's really difficult to write respectfully like this Melinda. I don't think you're 'speaking for the other', if that's what you're concerned about. Your 'speaking' in this series of poems about suicide is a way of listening to silenced voices (silenced because unheard not because unspoken). The poetry is also addressing a largely white audience - and that also poses all sorts of questions about the institutionalised identities that speak for others. In short, I can't tell you how much I look forward to reading your stuff!
ReplyDeleteAnd for many it is not something that can be spoken, the living as well as the dead, so to find ways to speak, to give voice, is necessary work. I look forward to more of this series too, though it wrenches my heart.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your comments, they mean a lot and will help me as I move forward with the project
ReplyDelete